Member-only story
This Little Piggy Went to Market
Were there really five little pigs? Were there any pigs at all?
Mommy says, “This little piggy went to market.” This is the second time in two days that Mama’s grabbed my big toe and said something weird about some piggy. Does she really mean my big toe is a piggy? Nah, can’t be. Mama’s just making me squirm.
Now, I ‘m thinking about some piggy gets in our car and drives down to Safeway Grocery with our reusable shopping bags, trots in the store with my mask on (ugh!), buys a sandwich and a pear and some grapes…. I have a hard enough time wrapping my head around that. But what Johnny said yesterday after Mama did piggy on me is worse:
“When a piggy goes to market,” my best friend told me, “it doesn’t bring home the bacon. It is the bacon.”
That’s awful. If my big toe ever was a piggy, it isn’t one any more, ’cause it isn’t bacon. It’s a toe, Mommy. Not bacon. Not a piggy.
An aside by a character who knows these things — Piggy count: 0, Toe count: 1
When Mommy gets to wiggling my second toe and says, “this little piggy stayed home,” I remove my toe from easy reach. This is my second toe, not a second piggy. Don’t call it a piggy.
This character won’t call your toe a piggy, ’cause it isn’t a piggy — Piggies: 0, Toes: 2
